Here Is To The Future

So this week I decided to make a real commitment to my little online business. I and going to post at least three new items every week along with at least one flash sale a week.
I am also going to try and take part in more craft fairs. In order to do this I will be relying on friends and family for support and lifts. In three years time I would love for making these little crafts and jewellery to be my full time job. I would love to be able to travel the country visiting craft fairs. Locally the pinnacle would be to take part in the monthly markets that take place at the Gloucester Quays Designer  Outlet.
Because I want this to be a success I am going to be making the move to selling my goods on etsy. This means I would really like to re-shoot all of items in a more professional manner. So if any friends would be able to help  we with photography or modelling of my jewellery I would be eternally grateful. I can pay you in pizza!!!
I also really enjoyed making the bath bombs so every month I will be releasing a new flavour or design!!! Again these will be sold or the bargain price of just £2.50 each!!! In May i will start selling three beautiful flavours being lavender fields, cucumber and green tea, and coconut dreams. I am also looking to release a unicorn themed bath bomb but that is just a dream!!!

These next few months are going to be full of hard work but I hope it all pays off and to all my friends who are able to help me with my dream, thank you honestly it means the world to me!!! So please tell your friends, show them what I make and encourage them to support my dream too!!!

Here is to the future

Love Hayley Beth XXX




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Always be a Rainbow in Someone Else's Cloud

Hello my lovelies!!!
so I am sorry if this blog is not as great as normal but I am really struggling to write something at the moment. So if you follow me on instagram and snapchat you will have seen that I never have the same hair colour for long!!!
Ever since I was about 15 I wanted to have candy floss pink hair. It was all I could talk about but m mum hated the thought of me ruining my blonde hair. It wasn't until I was 18 that I went out and bought a box dye and it was rather interesting. I was working at BHS at the time and quite frankly they hated it but the customers thought it was brilliant!!!

After the pink I went for another box dye this time purple. now when I first did this my friends thought they were proper comedians and sent me theses pictures.

Honestly it didn't look that bad but it really did not look great either!!!

Now after the purple I'm not too sure what I was thinking because I kinda went green. Yes that I right, I guess I thought I could pull off the mermaid look but alas it was quite the contrary. The dye I used was quite simply rubbish and I guess I should just show you what happened.

Never again will I attempt to be a mermaid!!!

I think the green must have put me off dying my hair for a bit because it wasn't until very recently that I dyed my hair pink again. This time it was more of a raspberry than a bright pink. I actually really liked this colour and if I was going to use a box dye again it would definitely be this one.

I am very lucky these days that I have a best friend who specialises in vivids. This means I never have to use a box dye again and can experiment a lot more!!! because of this I have recently been able to have a variety of colours in my hair. The first style we went for was a purple, pink and blue balayage which looked absolutely amazing although I was likened to the My Little Pony, Princess Twilight Sparkle.

The next style we went for was this beautiful blue and pink combo which I am actually in love with right now. I love the way that the pink comes through the blue. I just love it!!!

So were do I get my inspiration from? It would have to be Kasey O'Hara Skrobe aka Hair by KaseyOh

She is an absolutely brilliant vivids specialist from Maryland USA. It would absolutely mean so much if one day I could get my hair done by her. Her creations are so magical and never fail to make me go WOW!!!

Here is some of her work:

I hope this has given you some hair inspo and if you also love having crazy hair why not tag me in your pics on instagram!!!!

And just remember always be a rainbow in someone else's cloud!!!

Love Hayley Beth XXX

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Goodbye to those who loved me....

So I tried writing this on the 16th of march but it was just too hard.
I've taken some time at I have finally got my head straight.
The 16th of march was my sisters 18th birthday. The 16th of march was also the last day I talked to my family. I had finally lost it, I had finally had enough.
I had enough of always coming second fiddle to my sister, I had enough of my dad not even talking to me even when i was sat right next to him and I was fed up of never being good enough for my mum.
I honestly would rather have no family than live in a family where by lets face it im not liked all that much.
I am just lucky I have great friends and work colleagues who I can talk to when I need to.

Sorry for the daily blogging to be a bit of a flop but I will be back tomorrow with another blog which will be a hell of a lot more cheerful than this one!!!!

As always
Love Hayley Beth XXX

I've Been Struggling

Right now I feel as though I am of no use to anyone.
Having to struggle with money is incredibly stress full and I wish I hadn't chosen to move out. I know my life wouldn't be as it is now and I wouldn't have met all the friends I have now like James or Aimee or even Ben. But I would never want anyone to struggle like I have these past few months. I try to be strong about it and pretend that everything is ok but I'm really struggling at the moment. Last month I survived off just one meal a day. It caused me to be in an awful mood the majority of the time and I didn't have the energy for anything some days I wanted to just cry and cry but I couldn't is didn't have the  energy to do so.
I know this has put a strain on my relationship at the moment anyone with a brain would have ended it a long time ago but that is what Jack did and I want to be stronger than him. I don't want to give up just because things get a little bit tough.
I realise now I shouldn't have taken my self off of my anti depressants and not being able to afford them was a silly excuse not to go and get them I know my family would have helped if I had let them know what was going on but I couldn't. I need them to see that I am able to live on my own. I chose this life now I have to live it.
Even when I have no food in the cupboard I don't ask for help I know this annoys Ben and he worries about me because of it but I'm just not one who is capable of asking for help. I was raised not to let people know when I have issues to show the world you are strong even if you are falling apart on the inside. And although that is my greatest strength I know it is also my greatest weakness.
I have started to have panic attacks again an I often find my self waking up in the middle of the night crying. I  don't want to be like that again but I don't want to take medication at the same time. I want to be able to pull my self up out of this one.  I will need support but I know that I have a lot of people around me that love and care about me even if I don't always let them in I know they are there.
I'm going to start seeing my family more and I'm going to start eating properly. I'm not going to keep everything so bottled up and I'm going to start opening up to people especially my parents who don't know about me struggling.
I do miss living with them but i could never go back. things are no longer the same any more and they never will be. I tore my family apart. Moving out hurt my mum more than anything in this world and i am so so sorry for that. I know I ruined my relationship with my dad and I hate myself for the fact he barely talks to me any more even when I go round to see him.
I do love my family with all of my heart and I know that moving out was the biggest mistake I ever made. But I made it and I have to live with that.
I guess writing this was the easiest way for me to let people know what was going on in my head at the moment. I hope it makes people see why I have been the way I have for a while now and I am trying to sort my life out but it just takes time to work things out sometimes.
Love Hayley Beth xxx

Love, A New Me and An Evil Notebook

Well hello there!!!
So I have to apologise for my last blog it wasn't my finest hour but I guess it just shows that I am human! Anyway I thought I would just tell you what I have been up to recently!
As I have mentioned in previous blogs I have a boyfriend. So here are a few things about him. His name is harry, he is obsessed with skateboards and  motorbikes, he supports Birmingham City and he tells awful jokes. currently I haven't heard from him since Monday. And it is killing me. most people will think so what it ain't that long but when you are used to hearing from someone everyday it sucks. This is all because he is currently on a residential as part of his Princes Trust course. I miss him so much and time seems to be going by so slowly without him. I often worry that my constant need to hear from him is holding him back especially when he is with his new friends from the princes trust like he is moving on in life and I am just stuck where I am.
So that got deep. so what else have I been up to? Well I had a day off on Tuesday so I got all dressed up and went shopping. I have to say I felt far more confident in myself wearing nice clothes and make-up so I dunno this is the new me!!!

While I  was out shopping I found this really cute notebook with the words evil plans and stuff written on the front. As soon as I saw it I thought of my best friend and fellow blogger Kirstie (check out her latest blog here). She is absolutely nutty so when I see here next she has herself a little present lol!

I also bought myself a cute bag and purse from BHS and a skirt also from BHS. I paid for them using my star of the month gift card (that's right I am awesome at work lol!!!)
Tomorrow I am heading over to my Big brothers house for a day of movies, munchies and possibly a McDonalds.
So yeah I don't have the most exciting life but it is my life and well I love it!!!
So um yeah thanks for reading!!!
Love Hayley Beth xxx

Colour Blind

What does it mean to be colour blind? Well usually it means you are unable to distinguish any or certain colours. But in this case I am using the term colour blind as a metaphor. 
Have you ever felt a time where you have finally seen a persons true colours and they are not truly the person you believed them to be? Have you ever had a guy take you out for lunch and treat you like a lady to actually find out all they want is sex? Have you ever thought you could spend the rest of your life with someone only to discover that when you walk away that person will do and say anything in the hope that you will go straight back to them?
If you have been through anything like this I am proud to say you are no longer colour blind to that particular person. Unfortunately it is incredibly likely to happen again. 
But why do people do this? Why can they not be up front about who they really are or what they really want? I personally think it is because if they were to be true to themselves they wouldn't even get close to what they want because don't want to know someone of that character, they want to associate themselves with kind honest people. I also believe it is because some people want to be something they are just incapable of being. they want  to  be a true gentleman but their needs take presidents and needs tend to come before wants.
You may be wondering why I am talking about this subject. Well that is because recently I have been able to see many peoples true colours. Sometimes it didn't bother me so much but other caused me a lot of pain and emotion. But what I have learnt from this is that I have truly discovered the people who matter to me the most, the guys that will never leave my side. It has also showed me that no matter who I meet I always have to give them the real me. Yes they may not like it but I would rather they saw Hayley the bitch and liked me than having to keep up a façade to please them.

This blog has been a long time in the making and those closest to me will know the root to this subject.
Thank you for reading and I am hoping to post a new blog at least once a week from now on.

 














As always 
Love Hayley Beth xxx

Free As A Bird

So today I took my final ever exam!!!
I have to say it went rather well or at least I hope it did. I was lucky and got two questions on human rights and then two very nice questions about NCS.
Any way a lot has happened since I last blogged over two months ago now I think. so here goes:

• I was called a psychotic bitch by someone who doesn't really know me
• I had my hair highlighted for the first time
• I helped plan a sixth form party which has now been cancelled
• I may or may not of temporarily stole a teachers trainers in order to get the netball trophy back
• I have managed to put on a stone and 2 pounds 
• and finally I am going to be leaving school on Monday

I also think I lost a good friend. Lets call her Annie. Annie and I have been really goo friends these past two years and although we had our ups and down I think I could always depend on her to be their for me and visa versa. But this week she has been rather challenging. In fact I guess you could say I feel like all my efforts to help her have been thrown back in my face. You see she is a textiles student and that means all of her work has to go up in an exhibition. Now Annie whose work may I add is amazing, was rather slow to do this. Some of her work was actually incomplete. Being the person I am (I feel bad when people who I care about do not fulfil their potential) I tried to help her get it all up and when I moaned at her for not completing it she, well she disappeared. She did the rather childish thing of hiding in teachers class rooms. It really upset me because the only reason why I had attended school that day was to help her get her final bits up on her board. I well I have now given up on her because in a way she seem like a bit of a lost cause always pushing away help when people attempt to give it to her and then trying to get all the attention she possibly can when she knows she is in the wrong.

Any way on to my future. I am currently looking for full time employment, preferably with in human resources as this for some strange reason that not many people can get their heads around I really enjoy it. Strange huh!!!  I am also hoping to do NCS which is a great programme aimed at 16-17 year olds. Basically it is two weeks away from home at residential's and then you do about a week helping out in your community and making a difference. You also get to go to one big graduation party!!! In my local area of Gloucester you have to pay £35 but this is given back to you on completion of the programme. This scheme is only available in England and Northern Ireland so sorry to all you guys around the word!!!

I would also like to work at Glastonbury Festival with Greenpeace next year and I would also love to work as a councillor at Camp America. 
I hope you guys will continue to follow me on my adventures in the coming years and I thank you for all the support you have given me through this blog by just reading it.

As always my lovelies
Love Hayley Beth xxx

Teenagers

Teenagers are awkward.
OK well that is quite a blanket statement but in the main it is true. I know I can be quite an awkward teenager especially when it comes to those people I like or that I know possibly like me. This I have to say is happening at the moment. My friend whom I won't name has been acting weird (or shall we say awkward) around me recently and I am not the only one to realise it. It started with him winking at me and then watching my every move as i walked through a classroom no he can barely talk to me. And it is not just the things that I notice him saying. Many of our friends have told me about things he has said to them and the things he wants to say to me.
To be completely honest I want this to stop because i now find it awkward to be round my friends because of this. And to make matters worse one of our friends is just adding fuel to the fire by completely taking the mick out of him.
So as you can see teenagers are awkward and there isn't much we can do about it but I have to say I do believe that we will learn from this period of time to become socially capable adults.
as always love Hayley Beth xxx